I've noticed lately that towards the end of the summer, I always look forward to school now. It's a change of pace. Right now I'm loving it! I was getting so sick and tired of working all the time.

My classes are pretty interesting. Most of my friends still think I'm insane for liking math...too bad. It makes sense, it's interesting, and I like it, so deal! x) Right now taking Calculus II, Algebra I, a course called Problems, Conjectures and Proofs [an awesome course with an equally awesome prof], Geology [for my lab requirement], and French parce que j'adore le francais :D Everything is pretty neat and I'm not swamped with work [yet] which is nice.

Working part-time at my job now; I'm usually tired by the time I get there [because I usually have class right before the shift] but it's nice to have a bit of pocket money on the side.

Pretty satisfied with the way things are going. I miss my friends of course; Kelly's in Hamilton so it's rather difficult to arrange outings or whatnot, depending on when she's free and when I have a weekend off from work, and everyone else is in town but school has started so I don't get to see them much. Everyone is still within reach though, so it's not a big deal. I kind of want a girl's night soon though >_> want to drink and talk about silly stuff. Maybe go shopping...I need a fall jacket. And shirts that aren't tanks.

There are a few things that still need to change...I'm working on excersizing more, like going on walks/runs, doing crunches and the like (baby steps, baby steps) since I don't have the money to join a gym, and eating healthier in general. Cutting back hugely on sugary things. I realised that, due to convenience, sometimes I would consume up to three or four chocolate things / cookies / sweeties / pastry desserts / etc a day, and that's definitely not good! Waste of money too. So I'm taking the time to make food at home and taking it with me when I go to school. I'm so used to buying food though, that my lunch-making skills are severly lacking. Lol getting there though.

Also I've been saying this forever but I really need to clean my room. I have to get all the embarrassing stuff out of the way and then call someone to help me D: I get discouraged so easily, it's so freaking much... I'm actually not that much of a slob, I'm just careless. And when I'm not careless I'm lazy. So I'll be careless for a week and not put anything away, and then never fix it after. A few repetitions of this and...it accumulates. To a lot.

Playing WoW quite a bit as well. Leveled my JC, yayyy. I'm still broke though haha because whenever I make gold now I go and spend it on [Titanium Powder] almost right away, then trade it for Dalaran Tokens, and use them to buy epic recipes....exciting stuff! I'm just finishing up Zangarmarsh right now. So many mushrooomssss....reminds me of the pot-smoking caterpillar's hang-out in Alice in Wonderland.

Crushes are hard to get over. GAH I'm getting there though. I WILL get there.

I think I'm going to go draw something. And then paint it tomorrow. I've been itching to paint for a while...

A lot has happened, but also nothing has happened. Funny how that works, no?

I finished my first semester at York just over a month ago. I could've gone a lot better academically, but what can I do now? Work my ass off next term to get my average up. That means much, MUCH less time working at the job. I already told them I won't be able to work as much, but I don't think they get just how much less I mean. I mean not even all weekends. But school comes first so..yes. x)

I've started to accept that the guy I've kinda-sorta-on-and-off liked for the past two years or so will never like me that way. I've realized that even if he were to miraculously confess his undying love to me (whatever!), it wouldn't work anyway because we're too different. We like the same things, but we don't like them the same way, sort of thing. It's hard to explain. I've been pretty naive, but there you go. Time to move on!

I haven't been fully well in quite some time now. My doctor says the doctorly version of "LolIdunno", writes me up papers to get tests done, and sends me on my way. WTF.

I seem to be in a rut with most aspects of my life right now. It's like everything is in limbo, and if I want to change anything, I have to change it all at once, and I just can't gather the momentum to do it. Work, school, friends, family, health, money...all of it.

( Hmm...some not-so-fun stuff I've been thinking about a bit. Not sure why, but I always feel the need to put it behind a cut... )

Enough with the lame sob!chat though, my life isn't completely horrible! I just feel the need to elaborate about the little things that bother me. It's usually them that are most important anyway. That was only two paragraphs anyway, by the by.

I went to Anime North and Pride Parade, both were awesome! I've posted tons of pictures from both on Facebook, if anyone wants to add me, or if you already have, go take a gander!

I've recently started liking Axis Powers Hetalia, a cute little webcomic that's been turned into short five-minute anime episodes, basically about the chibified/bishiefied historical interactions of countries turned into cute boys and girls. All the countries are personified...for example, England and France are always fighting, America is obnoxious and likes burgers, Germany is headstrong, Japan pensive and like to build miniatures and mechas. Anyway.

There was a cosplay group at Anime North of people dressed up as the countries, and of course I freaked out when I saw them and got the to pose for me for a picture :) They asked me who my favourite character was and of course I was like, "Poland! Represent yo xD" and as I was walking away, Russia comes after me and asks, "Won't you come back to the Motherland?" with a completely straight face. I must've busted a gut laughing, oh man...that was funny.

There was a Digimon vs Pokemon dance-off and we won! Guess what side I was on xD Digimon love foreverrrr

Pride was amazingly fun, as always. You just get so into it, with all the music and dancing and cheering and hot men x)

In a week I'm going white water rafting with a friend and her other friends! I'm so excited, I can't even explain. I need to do something crazy and out of the ordinary, and this is perfect. Expensive...but I'm sure it will not disappoint!

I actually should go to bed though, since I have to work tomorrow. There's a sale starting and it's probably going to be crazy. yippee~!

So.

I'm in school. It's kicking my ass, but it's mostly of my own doing, or rather lack thereof. I'm bumming around with it way more than I should, so I'm a more than a little behind, but I really think I can still be okay at this point. My labs are coming back with decent grades and so are most of my quizzes and such. Still, I think a sense of anxiety is healthy for me. I need to get my butt in gear and actually complete work, not just think about it. Whee procrastination. And god, I hate stats. Favourite classes right now are Astronomy and Calculus though, how sad is that?

I've been working my butt off, resulting in being sick on-and-off and never being fully well for the past month and a half. I'm always so tired. The way my weekly schedule for school and work is set up right now is that I don't have a day off ever. Tues Wed Thurs I have school, Fri Sat Sun Mon I work, and I have a lab every other Monday morning, so sometimes on Mondays I go to school and then still do an eight hour shift at work aftwerwards.

People tell me I'm over-working myself and it's true, but I don't have much of a choice; I have to go to school and I need money to do that. The only time I've had a day off since school started was when I called in sick for work last weekend, and it was heaven. I honestly felt like crap - I had one of those lingering fevers where no matter how many times you shower, you just feel sweaty and sticky all day, plus nausea and dizziness and ew - but it felt like such an indulgent luxury to just sleep. All day long. They were perfectly wasted days. So desperately needed.

So right now I'm in this weird position where if life were an ocean, I would just barely be managing to tread water. It's pretty overwhelming. I appreciate sleep so much more now though.

The fact that I've become a WoW addict doesn't help any, but it sure is a stress-reliever to come home after a long day, kill things violently, and then go to sleep, haha. I'm a level 52 mage, whee. I'm squishy but I can hurl giant fireballs at people. I was texting back and forth with Kelly the other day and she said something like, "I'll see you wehn you come on WoW," I texted back saying how it amused me that it's changed from "if" to "when". She replied stating I was beyond help. x) Just a few days ago I had my first true camping/ganking session. I must've camped this guy for twenty minutes, it was awesome. For anyone that doesn't get WoW lingo, just ignore this entire chunk of jabber.

I got myself a paid LJ account but it looks like crap. I haven't had time to fix it up like I wanted to and make it all shiny and pretty. Just another thing on my ever-lengthening list to do.

Melissa wants to go to a Supernatural convention next year. Don't get me wrong, I love those boys! But it's so expensive, I honestly don't think it's a possibility to even think about it at this point. It was like $500+ for just the tickets, not to mention room and board, travel, food, etc. Just...yeah. Holy crap. I don't have a grand to give away on a convention.

Speaking of which though, I can't wait until Anime North. This year we've booked hotel rooms so we can stay down there instead of driving back and forth each day. This way we have a place to chill inbetween events if needed, and also we can go to late night events. The only problem is that because of the strike at York U, exams start the Friday of the con :/ Nobody knows when their exams will be, but we'll more than likely have to bring textbooks with us and study a bit while there, seeing as three out of four of us are York students...York can kiss my ass.

My dad left for Poland today to visit family, but mostly my grandmother (his mother) since she is getting on in her years and...well. We don't like to think about it, but she's probably not going to be around much longer. So he's visiting while he knows he can. I hope everything goes well but honestly? I'm just glad to have a break from him for the next two-three weeks. Whenever there's an argument in the house he's always at the centre of it, so. Maybe I'll have some relative peace for a while.

Long entry is long. So much for shorter entries more often...life has this way of toying with me...

Note to self: stop being obsessed with single things and start looking at the bigger picture.

So yesterday I come home from work and my youngest brother runs up to me, gives me a hug, and says, "Guess what Aggie? This year the hotel in Florida will have two pools!!"

In the living room, my mother makes a motion that can only be described as *facepalm*

...

What.

So yeah. Apparently, my parents have ONCE AGAIN booked a hotel suite FOR FOUR [read: me NOT INCLUDED] in Florida. Fucking TERRIFIC.

Last year they went during March Break and said I couldn't go because I had to work. This year...basically the same thing. Except this year, the were trying to keep it from me until way closer to their departure date, so I couldn't do anything about it.

Like it would change anything anyway. I still can't do much about the fact that they've formed their own little family without me. It's this whole get-a-job-go-to-school-move-out-and-leave-us-alone kind of vibe, and it doesn't feel very nice at all.

The signs are everywhere, really. For the past two years when they've made family calendars, I wasn't in them.

I've come home twice last summer with a note on the fridge saying the phone number at which they can be reached and "Be back in 4 days". Oh, and with no food in the fridge.

When I went to to meet them at Lake Superior I had to pay for my own $100 bus ticket, and only got paid back partially after a lot of hemming and hawing.

And once a few months back, I was home, NOT BUSY WITH ANYTHING, when my mom comes upstairs and tells me we're going out for dinner. I take 10 minutes to get ready, go downstairs, and find that they've already LEFT. Driven away without me.

Just FUCK. I'm so damn sick of being left behind in the dark, while they go about being a happy little family, and then tell me how much fun they've had.

Just....BALLS. I want to punch something. Dx

I've been feeling unnaturally pessimistic and neurotic lately. It's frustrating because I know I have no reason to be, but I can't seem to cheer up. I feel awkward being around people I've known for ages, and even though my skin is clearing up and I'm losing weight (bit by bit) I feel more like a loser than ever. I don't know, it just seems that everywhere I go there's a dark cloud over my head.

I know that one of the side affects of the medication I'm on (Accutane) is depression. I started taking the pills knowing this, so whenever I feel myself getting down I'll force myself into a situation that might cheer me up, like seeing a funny movie, going out with a friend, or treating myself to a new shirt, or something. Lately though, it's just been fruitless labour. I just feel blah all the time.

Of course, it doesn't help that almost every day is the same. With the exception of whenever Kelly is here, my days are just wake up, work, eat, sleep, rinse, repeat. I am LONGING for a change. School starts in a week and a half but UGH it's taking so LONG!

So I've decided that this week I am going to change arond the thing that is most immediate to me: my room. I've already changed rooms in my house, which is great, but this new room is still a mess from moving into it and it's really starting to feel stuffy and smothering. I'll clean it, organize it, get out all the stuff I'll be using on a regular basis and put it out front and put away all the stuff I seldom use or look at. After that, a new coat of paint will be in order. I'm thinking red. I'm sick of wishy-washy, I need BOLD.

I'm also going to make my lunch every single night for work the next day. I always end up eating things that aren't great for me because of their convenience. I'm also going to do a ten minute workout every night before I go to bed, and get a haircut.

I've decided I'm going to follow this strictly for at least a week, then evaluate and tweak things as necessary. I really, really just want a change for the better. I'm so bored with everything, and I really hate it. All the things that usually bring me some level of contentment are leaving me annoyed and full of a sick-and-tired feeling that makes me irritable and awkward. I want to feel involved with my life again.

Day One starts tomorrow :D

But first, I'll play some WoW. Lvl 37, w00t.

So, holy crap, I've been neglecting LJ. I've been working my ass off at my new job and I'm usually so drained at the end of the day that I'd either go to sleep or check email and do other internet things, and then go to sleep. But anyway.

Warning: Long entry is long.

( Re: New Job )
( Re: School, or lack thereof )
( Re: Friends )
( Re: Anime and WoW )

( More recently... )

I hereby promise to update on here with SHORTER, more frequent entries. Just lately I'd forgotten about LJ, oops. I'll probably finish this entry and forget about something important too, I bet.

Going on WoW now. xD

Side note: Sometimes I wish I were more of a geek than I already am. xD

I posted the remaining answers for the movie meme in the previous entry. Have a gander if you're curious. ^^

I start my new job on Tuesday! W00t!!! Sayonara, Tim Horton's. The people there are great and we get along amazingly for the most part, but I need more money. ._. Bills, school, rent, etc. This new job starts at $12/hour so. ^^ It'll be tons easier to save, also.

Went to Dave and Busters with Kelly, Kyle, and Mike, which was funnn. I discovered I was much better at pool than I thought. Though my shots were almost always prety damn good for my experience level, or completely, completely off. No inbetween. I had 4 or 5 drinks but felt not even the smallest buzz. Dx Alcohol skimpers. But yeah, 'twas awesome overall. Might go shopping with Kelly tomorrow again. Wheeee I love it when everyone's around!

Anime anime anime. Watching waayyyyy too much of it to be healthy.

More later. Brain is being uncooperative. I started with the intention of writing a whole bunch of things, but now I've forgotten them all. WTF, self!

Got this meme from bustix2000; it seemed like fun, so I thought I'd give it a go!

It's pretty simple - I post screenshots from my favourite movies, and you guess what movies they are.

The original meme called for 20 movies, but I put in 25, just because I can. :3

Comment with your guesses, and I'll replace each picture with the correct guess and the first person who guesses it!

( Warning: Not Dial-Up Friendly )

Should be pretty easy, guys; they're mostly all pretty well-known...well, there might be a few no one might get. Challenge: Prove me wrong!

Right. Due to many things happening at once, I have not posted in quite a bit. I am now fixing that.

( Long post is long. )

And I had the weirdest stroke of luck yesterday. I was at Walmart in the bra section (whee) and there was this lady who was looking for something to buy with this coupon she had. She couldn't find anything, so she gave it to me! And it was a 70% off your entire purchase coupon!! I was like, DUDE, SWEET!! I ended getting about $130 worth of clothes and things, but on the receipt two things ended up still being full-price, so I figure it must've been only up to $100 or something. STILL though. It was amazing. I skipped home. Okay, to the bus stop. LOL I was SO pleased.

I think I said I'd post pictures from something a few posts ago, but I forget what from...

EDIT: OH YEAH, FanExpo and Lake Superior...oops. x'D Still coming..

WTF. America needs to keep their war business to themselves.

America gets missiles in Poland.

This pisses me off. Even though I've never lived there officially, it's pretty much my home country. It's my heritage, and my entire family is there. I know these are drastic thoughts, but Poland doesn't need to be involved in another war. Many parts of it are still recovering from the last one. And after WWII, there was still Stalin, and communism only fell in 1989. The country is still rebuilding. So this is ridiculous.

To the American Government: Take your missile bases and shove them up your fucking ass.

Defending from Iran my ASS.

Just...this whole thing smells like ASS.

If I were an American voting in the future election, there is no possible way I would support McCain now. Pro-war fanatic.

Just.....UGH. DKJLSFLKJFLSK.

On another note...same as you, Katie, and not looking forward to FanExpo all that much. The whole price thing has sort of cast a shadow over the mere thought of it. I think I'll still enjoy myself at least..I don't know, at the basic level of contentment? But I probably won't have any major fun.

Bah. Didn't get the job. Oh well, onto the next.